Sunday, February 15, 2009

abandoning the angry elephant

There's an angry elephant who lives in my apartment building. I hear him at the most random times of day, but at night I think I've learned to sleep through his cries. He's extremely loud - deafening almost - but only cries out for about four seconds at a time. I first heard it a few days after I moved in and I thought it was a foghorn from a ship in New York Bay. But, I quickly realized that with the bay being several long blocks away, those who lived closer would be deaf by now. So it's not a foghorn. It's an angry loud elephant that lives in my building.

I've gotten pretty used to the elephant, as well as my life in New York/Brooklyn. But, at this point in my late twenties, should I be striving for being used to something or being happier?

How does one know when its time to move on? I have a history of making poor decisions in this department -- jobs, romances, moving, all of the above. But I've been contemplating a leaving New York move for a little while now, and I wonder when it will right to act (or not) on it.

Reasons to leave:
  • Its really f'ing expensive, everything from rent to Duane Reade
  • I am not able to enjoy what living here offers -- concerts, great dining, a swingin' singles life, etc. -- either because of expensive or because I work too damn much
  • The ex factor / a fresh start / I would be a much more interesting person elsewhere (?)
  • I work too damn much (the NY work ethic/hours)
  • Genuine interest in not spending my whole early adult life in one place
Reasons to stay:
  • Really good friends who I would miss sharing my life with
  • Because I won't let it "beat" me
  • a job / opportunity for advancement in my industry that may not exist in too many other cities
  • the bursts of happiness, particularly in Brooklyn
  • Because I know the subway
I wish I knew what the right decision was. To look into the crystal ball and see where I am, where I'm happy (if I'm happy) at 30. Because according to the actual psychic I met, 30 is going to be my year. But, since that's still three years away, where (and how) am I to spend those, counting down to December 7, 2011?

Also, does everyone in their late twenties spend as much time agonizing of the direction of their life as I do? Or does everyone else just not blog about it? Just curious.

1 comment:

Glitch said...

100% yes! I think/worry about it EVERY DAY! And, I think the fact that you know the subway system is impressive. Definitely goes in the "reasons to stay" column. I'm glad it's under the "great friends" note though.