Wednesday, August 12, 2009: 3:12pm
I've been on Weight Watchers before. The second time, in early 2008, I lost 25 pounds in just over four months. I was elated. Even more elated that, a year and a half later, I've kept off almost 20 of those pounds.
The first time, we don't talk about. It involved starving myself, while unemployed, and then GAINING a pound the first week. I GAINED WEIGHT BY EATING GRAPES. "Your body is just adjusting to eating less..." Blah, blah, blah. I sobbed on my bed and told my then-boyfriend I was never, ever going back. I did, but it still didn't work for me. Perhaps because I lived down the street from a Coldstone? I don't know.
But now, here I am: still 20 pounds lighter than I was in early 2008, but also still a fat-ass. Contrary to popular belief, once you go les and settle down, you do not have to put on forty pounds eating ice cream in bed while watching chick flicks. I refuse to get too comfortable. Not just for my girlfriend - although I'm certain, even if she wouldn't say it, she would find me sexier minus the gigantic thighs - but for me. I can choose not to be a fat-ass. So I am.
Today marks my second full, no-more-practicing day on the WW. I pee constantly. If you don't want to hear me say things like that, then it's probably best you just pass by this blog. Again, the peeing. So, yes, I spent about one-quarter of my day in the bathroom. And, honestly, our office bathrooms aren't really nice enough to spend so much time there. My rubbermaid water bottle and I will be BFF for the duration of this endeavor.
And, needless to say (but I will anyway), I'm rather hungry. The taco salad I brought for lunch, while only being three points, was filling for about three minutes. Then I moved onto my grapes. Nom nom nom.
About ten minutes ago, I went to the vending machine and bought some pretzels because they seemed like the most reasonable option. And, they probably were. But THREE points?! Gimme a break. I got, like, A pretzel. I know, I know... must plan ahead. Must drink more water (and pee more).
I'd like my gigantic plate of pasta now, please!