During my extended blogging hiatus, my financial situation not only did not improve, it actually worsened. If you can believe it, I am actually $550 overdrawn on my bank account as I type this. Pretty sure that means that my rent check will bounce by Monday. Can we say eviction?
I am overdrawn (mostly) because of my fake pregnancy. What? No, it's not the kind of thing that someone should lie about, but I did. I would probably be going to hell, if I really believed in it. I spent Monday in tears on my living room floor, trying desperately to defy my meekness and install an air conditioner myself. The thermometer in the room read 92 degrees (it was 105 outside in New York), and I after giving up before the early afternoon, I waited and waited and waited and waited and... you get the point... for an air conditioning installer person to rescue me. At promptly, um, midnight, he arrived. He only arrived because I claimed to be pregnant (I guess I'm glad I went off Weight Watchers last month). I just kind of blurted it out. I'm not a terrible person, I was just miserable and could not stand the heat any longer. Don't judge me.
I have air conditioning now and it's currently set at 64 degrees. It cost me approximately 1/3 of my paycheck (I wish I was kidding), and my next electric bill will only tell how much more before October.
I am also in the red because I went home to witness my little brother's high school graduation. Rental cars a expensive, not to mention that whole $4+ for a gallon of gas thing. Enterprise should rent hybrids. While visiting "home", I saw my high school math teacher that I was convinced I was going to marry. He's still single -- not sure how that can be-- and I briefly considered throwing myself at him. Had I been home another day, I might have.
I'm not sure why I can't get this whole grown-up finances shit together yet. Every month I skimp on everything and just a few days after my paycheck has been deposited I am f'ed again and can't buy milk. Twice this week I couldn't afford a cab to the Javits Center (it's about a million and a half long blocks away from everything else in Manhattan), that I would have been reimbursed for. That made me sad (and hot, because it's a loooong walk back to civilization).
So I'm pathetic and selling some things on eBay to try to get back into the black. Since all but two of my designer handbags were sold months ago, I've moved on to my DVD collection. I think the only thing in my entire apartment that has remained untouched in my quest to make quick cash has been my bookshelf. I can't bear to part with anything on it. Even if I don't always read the most challenging literature, having a small collection makes me feel smarter. And I certainly need something to maintain the little bit of self-esteem I have left before the bank takes that, too...
